Tuesday, October 31, 2006

In honour of Hallowe'en I give you: the new grail

Trends in fiction:

Lately, the biggest trend has been to write about the Grail, The Templars, the Codes and other boring stuff- cum-Dan Brown that makes me want to just yell "Watch 'Last Crusade' you friggin' morons!!!!"

Yet, this trend....like so many.... seems to be passe. It is no longer "in", ducks. To be in the innest of "in" crowds you have to be one step ahead of the times. Grail is SOOO done.

VLAD THE IMPALER is the new PINK!!! That's right, friends, farewell Brownish Templar's tossed, welcome Draculiana !!!

My RIP challenge post mortem post is dedicated to the one book on my list that has spurned the most attention of late: Bram Stoker's Vamp extravaganza.

I give you Dracula..... based ( loosely? ) on the horrificest of horrors, the darkest prince of all, that Transylvanian monstrosity, Vlad Dracula ( devil ) aka Guy who Stuck People on Poles while eating dinner out on the front porch of his castle aka Guy who feasted on the flesh and blood of his many victims in a strange masochistic eucharist/tryst aka..... okay, well, erm, you get the point!

Vlad is in, kids. For some tormented, tortured reason it is sexy and erotic to be the pale, fleshy prince with the odd shaped moustache and the thirst for new torturous inventions.

I give you proof:

The Historian by Elizabeth Kostova

Exhibit A: really long, ranting puzzle novel with far too many narrative points of view we renamed " The Dracula Code"

My Swordhand is Singing by Marcus Sedgwick

Exhibit B: very well written Teen book by the master of juvenile macabre. Romanian legend abounds

The Secret Life of Lazlo, Count Dracula by Roderick Ascombe

Exhibit C: Drac is a hot womanizing vamp who sucks lots of blood and kisses half the population .... the kiss of death mwahhhaaaahaaa !

Vlad Dracula The Dragon Prince by Michael Augustyn

More about the order of the dragon and lots of occultish stuff. Yum

Dracula anyone ?

And where else do we see threads of it? Buffy, the vampire slayer, slash Morticia posts about in her blog, Vampire Hunter D, and the latest teen blockbuster phenomenon Twilight by Stephenie Meyer ( the sequel New Moon has werewolfs and vamps deking it out.... boo ya ! )

As for Bram Stoker's original Dracula it creeped the hell out of me. And yet, there was some perverse eroticism streaming through it that was somewhat unexpected. The pale necks of Lucy and the sweet Mina, the heaving bosoms, the dark man creeping through the window with his thin, aescetic lips and drooping moustache and aquiline profile. Did I mention the heaving bosoms?! I was startled by its sexuality. And , moreso, how gawdawfully boring it got in the center bits with the long diary entries and notes and the travel time. Good lord, Jonathan Harker, how long were you on that bloody train?!?!

And Van Helsing....

Raise your hand if you can get Hugh Jackman in a turtleneck out of your head?!

Other RIP reads included:

The Obsidian Dagger by Catherine Webb

The Turn of the Screw by Henry James ( not his best short work.... try Beast in the Jungle )

The Thirteenth Tale by Diane Setterfield

The Naming of the Dead by Ian Rankin

Frankenstein by Mary Shelley

I was shocked that, as a stern and steadfast 19th Century fanatic! I had never read Dracula or Frankenstein before this Hallowe'en.....odd.

I cannot wait for Carl V to post something Christmas-y for the next challenge.


Anonymous said...

Go Dracula!!!! You rock!

Anonymous said...

I still can't beleive it has taken you this long to read Dracula & Frankenstein! Or that I read certain classics before you did!

Yay Hugh Jackman as Van Helsing! YUM.

Kailana said...

You could join in on the November reading challenge that I am having.... Well, I am doing and other people decided to do it too. It is not as organized as R.I.P.

Carl V. Anderson said...

Dracula remains at the very top of my list of favorite novels. The first time I read it, around age 12, I thought the whole middle section was very boring. As I've gotten older I find that I love every last word. It is such a wonderful, remarkable tale. Love it!

Hmmm....a Christmas challenge, eh?

Carl V. Anderson said...

I've posted my R.I.P. wrap-up and a manageable Christmas Challenge is in the works, details to come.